For Miss B

A little something I wrote for my daughter.

My name is Bailey, and I am almost FOUR!

I like singing, dancing, and playing with my pet rat, Smokey. (He loves to lick my cheeks –especially when I’ve been eating chocolate!)

I live with my Mummy, and my big sister, Cooper. Cooper loves to draw. I like to draw too – usually my pictures are all one colour, and sometimes I draw the same things over and over.

We look the same – everybody says we look just like our Daddy, but Mummy says my brain is different to Cooper’s. She says I have Aspergers.

Sometimes I have trouble understanding things.

Like why the kids at school follow me around, or sit so close when I’m playing.

Mummy says they want to be my friend. I am learning how to be their friend, too.

I can be very shy, and sometimes I have trouble finding the words to talk to people. This doesn’t mean I don’t want to, though... Once I get to know you, I do LOTS of talking!

Sometimes playtime can be a bit confusing. I might need someone to help me work out what to do next. Other times, I play with the babies – they like to do what I do, and I can teach them things.

Playtime can be very NOISY!

I can hear music, yelling, squealing, laughing, talking and toys that whizz and whir – all at once!

This hurts my ears, and makes me feel confused and scared.

Sometimes when this happens, I need to cover my ears or run away.

If I try very hard, I can pretend that things don’t upset me too much... but all the different noises, bright lights, funny smells, and different places I go, can get st uck inside my brain.

This really hurts - I don’t like it at all, and it makes me cry... a lot.

When this happens, I am the one who is noisy! If I can’t find the right words to talk about my feelings, I shout and scream and bang things.

My sister says this makes her feel scared. I don’t like scaring my sister, so I am learning how to make myself feel better.

I do this by chewing my special necklace, cuddling a soft toy, or hiding under a big heavy blanket.

My brain is different in other ways too – it can do things that make me feel really SMART!

I love doing puzzles, and using the computer. I can play games and draw pictures with the mouse. Sometimes when my brain needs a rest, playing a computer game can help me feel better.

My brain can remember lots of interesting things - sometimes I remind my Mummy about our adventures, and the people we have met.

I’m g ood at remembering numbers and letters too – I can write my name, and count to 20 all by myself!

Even though some things are harder for me to learn, there are LOTS of things I can do really well.

Mummy says she loves my "different" brain... she says it makes me who I am.

I think I do, too.